Sunday, May 10, 2009

I promise there will be happiness tomorrow! XD

Okay, I have one more debatable issue to touch on and then I promise tomorrow I will go back to descriptions of my happy, funny, non-controversial art school days tomorrow. I just have one more thing I want opinions on.
My friend who I'm not naming out of respect for her, has been my best friend since 6th grade. We braved through 6th grade choir, fought through 7th grade, and graduated 8th grade hand in hand with plenty of satires and sex jokes. We're the type of friends who stab at each other constantly and then come running the very second we even suspect that the other feels bad. Now we're both in our freshman year and we're doing everything we can to help each other through any tough spots we run into. Ingrain this into your head.
We are FOURTEEN.
And today she messaged me frantically asking for advice on a boy who wants to have sex with her.
This really bothered me. Don't worry, I don't think she'll do it. We had a long discussion and I know she's stronger than that. Just is it just me or is the age women are becoming sexually involved lowering?
Maybe I'm just worried for my friend, but our discussion tonight made me realize the entire issue sex is kept from a lot of teenagers. Even in the health classes I've gone through, no one has actually given me an age limit or an amount of time you should be dating the person. They only cover the basics. Public schools tell you that you need to stay safe and wear a condom and Catholic school made it clear you needed to slam your dick in a drawer and pray to God to take away your urges. They never told you when would be a good age to actually invoke these practices (So I guess I'm more aimed at Public School Sex Education then the Catholic school Chastity Ed) Parents aren't much help either. Most parents seem to feel that if they tell their children about the age they had sex it will give their kids permission to go out and screw anything that moves. And I don't understand this. I think if parents were open with their children about how old they were during their first time and how they felt about it, whether they should have waited or whether they felt it was right, would make a world of difference.
I'm trying not to ramble so here's my question. When do you feel is an appropriate age for people to start having sex? And how long do you think they should have been dating each other? I said out of high school and at least a year. I'll probably even wait longer than that. Anyway, what are your thoughts?
And if you comment with a few thoughts, I promise I'll write about something happy and non question asking tomorrow :)

3 comments:

  1. Good topic lol. And where as I agree with you on that I also believe there is no actual set age, mainly because people mature at different speeds. What I think you should base it on instead, is, you TRUELY love the person and want to devote your life to them. But, a lot of teenagers will claim this is so, so your partner and you should also meet a few requirements. Like say, you've been going out for several years, how sexually active you both are, how serious you are, etc etc.

    But hey, I also think people should have a lisense to have kids.

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  2. it is hard for me to decide what is the appropriate age to start having sex but not so much on how old you should be before you start dating. it is okay, to me, to date or to be in a relationship at a young age. you can be 12 or 14 years old and it is okay to have a boyfriend. but! when it comes to sex, i have stress out that you should wait until you are completely ready for not just the sex itself but also what the outcomes may be.
    you need to ask yourself, are you ready to have sex/ lose your virginity? and if you are, why are you doing it? is it going to be worth it? is the person you're going to have sex with worth it? how will it affect your body and mind? are you willing to risk yourself getting pregnant/ get contracted with sexually transmitted diseases (condoms are not 100% safe, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Condom#Causes_of_failure)?
    personally, i would wait until i am at least engaged before i indulge myself in the world of sex. :)) and i agree with lcy947, wait until you found someone you truly love and want to spend the rest you life with. do it with someone responsible and someone who respects you. call me conservative, but trust me, it's worth the wait. and it's for your own good. i mean, imagine spending the night having sex with a guy you thought was your true love when you've just known each other for 2 months and the next week, he dumped you for another girl!

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  3. There was stat done that girls lose it at 16 and guys lose it at 18. I have friends who lost it at 16 and even at 22. And the people I know who lost it after 20 doesn't necessary mean that they're more mature, they jus tdidnt have the opportunity to earlier (which they told me).

    I don't believe in a set age, as long as it's legal then hey go for it if you feel it's right!

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